I really felt ready to come back the last time I spoke to you all after my little blogging break. I was certain everything was back on track and I’d really love to blame Mercury going retrograde but, July was my toughest month of an otherwise beautiful 2019. I had mental breakdown after mental breakdown, I strayed from my spirituality as a result, choosing to wallow in my negative emotions and close myself off to actually facing my internal struggles… I was a mess.
After my last breakdown and panic attack, I guess I found it in me to put a bit more effort into myself and remind myself that I am stronger than my past and bigger than my failures; I reminded myself that I wasn’t who or what my ego was telling me, and day by day, I tried a little harder to climb out of the darkness… I’m back for another try at this starting over thing and I really hope this creative light that’s shining over me right now along with this positivity sticks.
I want to dedicate August to recreating myself (again). I want to dedicate it to finding new passions and reigniting old ones, spreading love and tapping back into my spirituality which I’d sadly let falter while I was in my state of constant panic and internal battles. I want this month to be my clean slate and I want it to be good.
I have a short list of goals I’d like to share with you with hopes that this will hold me accountable. Most of these goals are personal because I am my top priority this month, as you should try to be too, for yourself. Here we go! In the month of August, I’d like to:
I’d like to get back into quietening my mind and calming myself, especially before leaving the house. Meditation has helped me make some pretty good decisions previously, and I also learned a lot about myself and managed to heal aspects of myself through it, so it’s definitely top priority for me!
Create more content
Especially for this blog. I feel like I’ve been slacking… I just mainly want this space to be where I share myself with you. In this post, I spoke about my plans for When Lydia Smiles going forward. I’m excited!
Create an entirely new blog
I’ve been thinking a lot about one of my other loves which is fashion design. Like any other passion, it only gets better and stronger the more you tend to it (like a garden!). Apart from the sketches I create when I’m bored, fashion hasn’t been top of my ‘things to tap into’ list in a while which is unfortunate since one of my big career goals is to have a clothing line. This new blog, I’m hoping, will most likely be a sort of portfolio for my fashion passion; it will force me to keep my finger on fashion trends while also documenting the evolution of my personal style too. Fun!
Spend more time being creative (for myself)
I’ll be continuing with my book-writing this month and creating more fashion sketches as a form of self-love and tending to my inner child since these are the things that brightened my childhood, I remember.
Get back into yoga and working out
Because our summer is 3 months away.
Focus on my studies
I want to give college one last dose of serious focus and energy so I have less academic stress as the year draws to a close.
Be in the moment
I want to be more present and attentive of my daily life. This will allow me to better spot my blessings and synchronicities and get me out of my own head. I’d like to get my head out of the clouds too and stop fussing over my future by just taking things as they come and when they come.
Regarding my social medias and my blog, at this point my goal is to just get back into it with love. The numbers don’t matter to me at the moment.
This month is also Women’s Month in South Africa—a month in which we celebrate the leadership and strength of the +20 000 women who, in 1956, marched against the apartheid laws in South Africa which forced black people to carry passes (IDs) with them at all times or risk imprisonment. So, to all the ladies reading this post this month, I hope you realise your strength and kick the butts of all obstacles standing between you and your goals/ dreams as of this month.
Here’s to a hopeful month ahead and thank you so much for your patience, angels!