7 Things To Remember When You Feel Stuck


Often times, giving up feels like the best option. You’ve tried numerous times to make something work, you invested money, time and emotions you can never get back but it doesn’t seem like you’re moving forward. It’s happened to me. There are plenty of occasions that I’ve poured my sweat and tears into something that I really wanted to make a success out of… but nothing. And when everyone you know is easily attaining everything they want, feeling like total crap is the only way to go, right? No!

In light of me turning March into the month of motivation for all my readers, I’ve come equipped with some reasons you should keep going and never give up. Some of my reasons may be cliché but that doesn’t take away the point that they are facts and have worked wonders for people who took this advice at some stage in their lives upon feeling like their lives were stagnant.

Remember why you started:

It’s so easy to want to throw in the towel when the going gets tough but, remember when this was a great idea in your mind and it kept you up at night and when you began, you had all this energy and love for this project and if anyone woke you up at gunpoint at 3am to ask you why you were doing this, you knew for a fact you’d be able to whoop out a PowerPoint presentation to explain with passion why you wanted to do this thing? That right there should always be your fuel when you’re feeling low.

Sometimes I look at my blog stats and feel like I’m not doing enough even though I’m doing the best I can with what I have access to. Remembering my goal— why I even wanted to create When Lydia Smiles is enough to make me feel like I’m on the right track as long as that fire still burns within me.

Always have the aim of changing one person’s life/ opinion/ perspective with your content

(or whatever else you’re passionately into) and that will drive you on forever, despite the numbers.

Numbers don’t lie but they don’t always matter:

This one if for my fellow content creators. In a world where social media can literally be one’s bread and butter, looking at stats can suck the life out of you and it shouldn’t. Social media should never have you feeling like crap and if it does, honey, you need a good social media cleanse and detox before you lose yourself. Here’s a fact: a lot of ‘successful’ content creators have thousands (maybe millions) of followers online. How many of those people have genuine followers who aren’t robots? How many of those ‘influencers’ actually use their platforms to spread a positive message, engage authentically with their fanbase or even raise awareness about pressing social issues? It’s all beef and competition!

Just because someone has a whole bunch of followers, doesn’t mean that they’re better than you

If you are using your platforms for good and are constantly true and loving in everything you put out, it’s only a matter of time until the numbers catch up to you. Everyone
started off with 0 followers at some point, and while you might envy that so-and-so with their 500k followers is scoring free paid vacations abroad… know that your time will come. Just enjoy the journey to that point in your own career.

There is (and will ever be) only one you:

And only you have the ideas that you do, only you see things in the way that you do and only you can change something in this world in a unique way. The cosmetics industry is massive with brands such as Maybelline and L’Oreal having existed for ages. They’re literally making millions in money every day and coming up with new products that they’ll find a way to convince us that we need, on a daily basis. These companies have people who work around the clock to throw out ideas, find problems in society to solve relating to the skin… let’s not get into marketing because they probably have building offices for that alone. But… one day, a little girl from Barbados grew up and gave all these companies a run for their money. Fenty Beauty thrives in a world full of existing makeup brands. Why? Because only Rihanna could think of the beauty industry and see it the way she did and only she had the courage to challenge these companies regardless of the risk.

Only you have the power

You started your blog, you YouTube channel, writing your book, sketching for your dream clothing line—whatever it is— because you realised that even though there are millions of people already in these fields, you have something unique to offer. That should be your drive— your perspective and determination to say something should overrule any other factor, especially that ‘there are already too many people doing that’ voice.

You inspire:

If you have children of your own, know someone who does or work with children, you’ve probably already figured out that these little angels are forever observing to learn something. When I started actively reading in front of my 3 year old, I’d walk into the room and find her holding a book (upside down lol), trying to figure out what was going on because she saw me do it. My point is, you never know who’s watching. Don’t let this idea weigh you down and make you feel like you need to do more but, you have someone who probably follows your journey on Twitter or Instagram and hasn’t found the courage to begin but they look at your work and feel they can look up to you.

It might only be one person who feels like that towards you but one person is always enough! Keep doing the best you can and be honest about your journey— tweet that you’re not getting enough sleep because you’re juggling every day life with your passion— someone is living the exact same way as you are but are too scared to begin their own thing because they think it’s impossible. JK Rowling was damn near homeless, raising a kid by herself while recovering from an abusive relationship and she managed to write her first novel with her baby in her lap and the money barely coming in.

You don’t know it but you’re an inspiration just by living your life as best you can while giving out the best possible content under whatever circumstance

Look at you!

Today might be the day:

I once saw this illustration on Facebook of some guy who was digging for diamonds and gave up just before he got to them. He was just one big hammering away from breaking the barrier between him and his treasures and he chose to walk away simply because he’d been digging forever and nothing had come to light since he began. That’s powerful. What if you posted one more blog post today or went to the gym even though you didn’t feel like it? what if you handed out one more job application today or even went out for coffee today to at least try and get some air for later? I’ve learned that the Universe works in mysterious ways. Your ‘one more time’? You pushing yourself to do something you don’t really feel like doing? You don’t know who might stumble upon your work that day or who you might meet who could help you. If you feel like giving up or don’t feel good enough, that’s okay!

Do it one more time today, one more time tomorrow and one more time the day after that until something happens

Don’t give up.

You need a storm for a rainbow:

You need dirt for flowers to grow and you need to scrape your knees a few times before you can ride that bicycle without the training wheels. You can’t expect success without a few bumps in the road! Getting hurt in the form of losing followers, having a slump in your blog/ YouTube stats, writer’s block… they’re all part of the growth process and it’s always in moments like these that we can actually reflect on what we really want.

Why do followers matter to you? are you making money off of how many Instagram likes you get? No? Reflect! why are your stats decreasing in number? Are you promoting as best you can? Are you interacting with other content creators on a genuine level? What’s different about your content now versus your content when your stats were thriving? How
can you improve your work? Why is it hard to produce something new today? Have you been authentic in your content? What are the things that feel true to you to talk about Reflect!

Sometimes it takes something huge happening to us to give us a push in the right direction

We focus so much on the negative that we forget that we once asked for a sign from God/ the Universe to help us get to where we want. Oprah couldn’t have become Oprah had she not gotten fired from her job in her 20s and Nelson Mandela couldn’t have become the icon he is today had he not got thrown in prison for his strong opinions and beliefs. It’s always about perspective and yours should always be that any setback you encounter, no matter its magnitude, is a sign for you to reflect. If you think of life as a maze, you’ll realise quickly that every blockage is there to tell you to change routes. You cant stand in the corner of your maze that literally has no way forward and expect to get
to the prize.

God is in the neighbourhood:

Lastly, when everyone around is you getting blessed with success, the best thing to do is celebrate with them from the depths of your heart because that energy— that love and genuine happiness for someone else— is exactly what’s coming back to you, manifested as your own success.

“When your neighbours are getting blessed, prepare yourself because God is in the neighbourhood”

Essentially, when all the people on your Twitter feed are talking about a rise in their blog engagements or a rise in their blog followership, for example, “prepare yourself” by means of putting your best foot forward too and be to others what you want them to be to you. If you want soaring blog stats, for example, go show a few other bloggers some love by reading, liking, sharing and commenting on their content. If you want to be a successful world-renowned author someday, support other writers by buying their books and, for those you come across on social media who are still working on their projects, offer your help and support. When the people around you succeed, there’s no way you wont soon succeed too if you’ve been putting your best out there and doing your best to help them get to that point in their respective careers.

My list could go on and on but these are essentially my top 7— one piece of advice for every day in the week that you feel down about your passions. You are very capable of being and doing whatever you want to. There is no one who could create anything the way that you could and that’s a good piece of motivation within itself.

Imagine a world where Steve Jobs didn’t create Apple because he reached a hurdle once and decided he was done or imagine if someone else had invented Apple! Would it be the same brand people know and love today? What if Vera Wang had decided, when she got to her 40s, that she was too old to pursue a career in fashion? What if you give up today? You’ll never know what you could become so, if it burns bright inside you— if it’s all you think about, all you talk about, all you research when you get a minute to spare outside your daily routine… even if you gave it up for a few months but found yourself sitting in front of it yet again for the 100th time in your life, it’s your calling and the world needs you to keep going (sounds like a superhero thing, doesn’t it?).

Keep on going!

Images courtesy of unsplash.com

15 thoughts on “7 Things To Remember When You Feel Stuck

  1. Brilliant blog. Appeared just at the right time. I struggled so much yesterday with my instagram, trying to get a link to work, literally hours and was so wound up. I’ve only a handful of followers which is fine, it’s just that I haven’t increased my following by 1 even with my blog, but I’ve read you blog and I’m letting go of the frustration – followers may or may not come – it’s not life or death xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Another beautiful and inspiring read. I agree we all have hurdles and difficulties along the way, we should never give up at the first challenge.
    Thank you for sharing with us.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Such a lovely read Lydia. I have only just started blogging and am struggling with followers and engagement on my site. I have only started twitter this week and its been helpful and enlightening reading and hearing from other bloggers. Thank you. What i will take from this is ‘remember why you started’. Thank you xx

    Liked by 1 person

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